We’re all older than we were yesterday, but ageing is something that seems to become more pressing when we’re in our 40s and 50s, as journalist Melissa Doyle has discovered.
“One of the things that shocked us was how many women say they get to an age and they start to feel invisible,” she says.
How do we feel about ageing?
Melissa and her best friend, fellow journalist Naima Brown, spoke to women from around the world to explore what women really feel about ageing. Their book Age Against The Machine highlights the essential things every woman should consider in midlife and beyond.
“A question that rose to the surface for us pretty early on in the research was, what is the difference between becoming elderly and becoming an elder?” says Naima.
“We quickly realised that how you might answer that question has a lot to say about you – and whether you are on a pathway of dignity, of purpose, of connectivity or whether you're starting to feel that sense of being pushed aside – you know, sat in the corner with your knitting needles.
“Being an elder is a true acknowledgement that your experience is of value and has a role to play, whether it’s in any industry or any environment. And it's because of your age that you are qualified for this, not in spite of it,” she says.
Recognise your value
Feeling valued can have a key role to play in our confidence and sense of self-worth, especially as we hit midlife.
So recognising your worth in yourself is vital. It’s something Melissa Doyle understands all too well. Melissa lost her job as a reporter/presenter with the Seven Network just as she approached her 50th birthday. After 25 years, including as host of Sunrise and then Sunday Night, suddenly she found herself unemployed.
“It's so easy to feel forgotten, pushed aside, invisible, whatever all of those negative words are. (So) it has to actually be a thought process where you go, ‘You know what, dammit, I've got 50 years of experience, this is what I've done. This is who I am, this is what I've learned along my path.
“This is what I can do with it, this is how I can potentially share it’. So what if I'm over a certain age or I've got a couple of you know, ‘Arctic blondes’, as I call grey hairs! No big deal. I'm smarter and more experienced than I was 20 years ago.”
Listen to more of Melissa and Naima discuss empowerment at midlife in this episode of Thriving in Menopause.
Listen to the full episode here, or download from your favourite podcast platform.
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