How to Cope with A Cancer Diagnosis

“Receiving a cancer diagnosis in the family turns your world upside down,” says Sandy Cham, executive director – Services at Canteen Australia, a support service for young people impacted by cancer. And many of us will either have that experience ourselves, or help a loved one through it, as around 43% of people will be diagnosed with cancer by the age of 85.

We asked Cham, also a psychologist, all about how you cope with a cancer diagnosis, and what sort of support can help you through.

What is the emotional impact of a cancer diagnosis?

With that [diagnosis] comes deep fear and uncertainty and considerable trauma. It's normal to feel shocked and be in disbelief at first. Fear and anxiety about the future, treatment, and even mortality can be overwhelming.

“Feeling isolated and misunderstood can be a big struggle, so it's important to remember that these are all valid responses, and there's no right or wrong way to feel. However, if these emotions become overwhelming or interfere with daily life, seeking professional support can be incredibly helpful.

What are some helpful ways to cope with a cancer diagnosis?

Talking to someone you trust: Talking openly about your emotions can be a huge relief. Our counsellors help young people and families to develop strategies to deal with the impact cancer is having on their lives and are there to listen.

Joining a support group: Connecting with others who understand your experience through an organisation like Canteen can be invaluable.

Maintaining healthy routines: Eating well, exercising, and getting enough sleep helps manage stress.

Relaxation techniques: Practices like mindfulness meditation or deep breathing can be calming.

Creative expression: Art, music, or writing can provide a healthy release for emotions.

What are the different ways to offer support to friends or loved ones?

Be a good listener: Lend a listening ear without judgement, simply be present.

Offer practical help: Offer to run errands, cook meals or help with childcare.

Respect their boundaries: Some people may want space, while others will crave company. Respect their needs.

Validate their feelings: Acknowledge their emotions and let them know it's okay to feel however they feel.

Include yourself in their support network: Seek out resources or join support groups together.

How do you know if a loved one needs additional emotional support?

Again, listening is such an important skill, and especially so when you’re supporting a friend or loved one through a cancer diagnosis. When we show we’re really listening, it’s much more rewarding for your loved one, and you’ll get more out of it too. You might notice your loved one is experiencing:

Loss of interest in activities they once enjoyed.
Changes in sleep or appetite.
Increased withdrawal from social interactions.
Difficulty managing daily routine

If you notice these signs, let them know you are here for them and encourage them to seek professional help.

What sort of self-care does a cancer patient need?

For patients, even though cancer can make you feel quite sick, staying as healthy as you can while being treated will help your body recover from the treatments and give you the best chance of coping with it all.

Focus on physical health: Eat nutritious meals, get enough sleep and stay active through exercise.

Maintain emotional wellbeing: Practice stress-management techniques and seek professional support from a counsellor if you need it.

Connect with loved ones: We see time and time again how crucial the healing power of connection is for our young people. Social interaction fosters a sense of belonging which can be helpful during treatment and beyond.

Do things you enjoy: Make time for hobbies or activities that bring you joy.

What sort of self-care does their main support person need?

If you have a friend or loved one who is impacted by cancer, it’s important to remember that while you are worried about them, it is vital that you take the time to look after yourself.

Don't neglect your own needs: It's important to maintain your own physical and emotional wellbeing.

Seek support for yourself: Talk to a therapist, counsellor, or connect with others who understand what you are going through.

Delegate tasks: Don't be afraid to ask for help from friends, family, or community resources.

Set boundaries: It's okay to say "no" and take time for yourself to recharge.

Practice relaxation techniques: Taking care of your own stress levels benefits everyone.