While you get your life back in order after a bumpy few years, it’s actually a great time to put bad habits in your rear-view mirror. And not just the be-a-better-human ones, like curbing that tendency to perhaps swear too often – we’re talking about addressing behaviours that may actually harm your health. Freeing yourself of these can be just as important as eating more vegies or solidifying a workout routine. No matter what you want to quit, these expert-backed tools will jump-start your transformation.
6 habits everyone should drop today
Relinquishing these common tendencies can help you feel more emotionally grounded, say experts.
1. Shopping for happiness
“So much of our energy is spent chasing things we think will make us happy,” says psychologist Dr Amy Johnson, author of The Little Book of Big Change. “The next holiday, losing a few kilos – they never lead to lasting happiness.” However, teaching a child how to read, having adventures with friends, working in the garden – intangibles like these give you real warm and fuzzies.
2. Tracking those who disappoint you
We all remember someone who didn’t come to our party or a person who didn’t reply to our email or text. “This ‘injustice collecting’ causes you to see the glass as half empty versus half full,” says psychologist Dr Renee Exelbert. “Instead, embrace gratitude for those who do show up.”
3. Constantly checking your phone
Keep your phone off the table – or, better yet, in your bag – when you’re with people. “You can’t focus [when it’s in view]; it shortens your attention span,” says clinical psychologist Dr Lori Whatley. Keep your full attention on the conversation.
4. Comparing yourself to others
“By learning to focus on yourself instead of others, you can decrease your stress and anxiety, increase your happiness and self-esteem and live a more purposeful and authentic life,” Dr Exelbert says.
5. Nourishing grievances
“Holding on to anger may increase blood pressure and the risk of coronary heart disease,” Dr Exelbert says. To switch gears, start thinking about all that’s going well for you.
6. Managing Everything
Whether you’re dealing with a group project at work or planning a family reunion, it’s easy to fall into the trap of doing most of the work to ensure results. But let other people pick up the slack. “We go through life as if we’re responsible for every outcome we experience,” Dr Johnson says. “We fail to recognise just how much happens effortlessly. Seeing what’s working through us, for us, without effort needed, is a giant relief.” Allowing others to shoulder some of the burden will lower your stress levels and you may be pleasantly surprised with the outcome – even if it isn’t perfect.
HOW TO QUIT: Excess sugar
Sugar is far from evil, but, as most of us know, eating too much added sugar can increase the risk of some cancers and conditions like heart disease and diabetes. What makes cutting back so difficult is that your body needs it for energy, and your sugar-consumption habits often form very early. “The preference for sweet-tasting foods is innate,” says dietitian Marisa Moore. She explains that there’s an evolutionary drive to nourish your body – so don’t beat yourself up if you’re struggling to lower your intake. You can also try our sugar-dodging tactics:
ANALYSE CRAVINGS: Pay attention to when cravings hit. If it’s always a 3pm urge, then pivoting to protein-rich snacks at that time may be helpful.
UNDERSTAND YOUR NEEDS: Sugar may make you feel better, but it’s not always the best remedy. If you’re reeling from a stressful conversation, a break to breathe in and out would be more helpful than that chocolate bar. Take a minute to listen to your body. Are you battling a headache? That may mean you’re hungry for a meal.
SUSTAIN YOURSELF: Nutrition experts say that eating properly and staying hydrated throughout the day will help you avoid sudden spikes and drops in blood sugar and soften cravings. And when you’re truly hungry, having a snack that’s a mix of healthy fat, protein and fibre will provide the most satiation.
BALANCE YOUR MEALS: Follow this simple principle: To feel fuller for longer and to stabilise your blood sugar, fill half your plate with vegies, a quarter with protein and the remaining quarter with carbohydrates. Does it need some kick? Spices such as paprika, cumin or cinnamon can boost flavour without adding sugar.
ASK FOR SUPPORT: The best friends will help you be more mindful and support your efforts. Avoid those who side-eye you if you say no to a sugary cocktail or pressure you to have dessert if you’ve already had enough sugar for the day.
Craving something sweet? Try:
- Sliced apple with nut butter
- Four squares of dark chocolate
- Plain Greek yoghurt topped with berries
- Herbal tea with vanilla
- A handful of dried fruit and nuts
- A piece of ripe, juicy fruit
HOW TO QUIT: Sabotaging your sleep
If you start another episode of your favourite TV series at 1am with a hectic morning to come, you’re engaging in what sleep experts call ‘revenge bedtime procrastination’. People who delay bedtime know it will lead to negative consequences but do it anyway, says sleep medicine psychologist Dr Michelle Drerup. She says she’s had an influx of patients who fail to go to bed at a healthy hour despite facing zero barriers to doing so. Sound familiar? Try these techniques:
RETHINK YOUR SCHEDULE: Your late-night habits may be fuelled by not having enough free time. Take a hard look at your day to work in ‘me time’ long before bed.
SET A RECURRING ALARM: Rather than prioritising a certain bedtime, focus on waking up at the same time every day so your body’s internal circadian clock will naturally create sleepy feelings at night.
TURN OFF AUTOPLAY: Letting go of screens in bed is hard, but disabling the autoplay function on Netflix can help.
BLOCK YOURSELF: Forest is an app that allows you to set a period of time when you commit not to use your phone/tablet. During that time, a digital plant will grow in the app. If you use your device at this time, Forest sends you a notification to get off the app or your plant will die!
HOW TO QUIT: A toxic friendship peacefully
GRADUALLY DRIFT: Distance yourself while you decide how to end things.
DISCUSS IT GENTLY: Avoid generalisations about them and use ‘I’ statements when it’s about how you feel. If you’re hashing out an issue, share responsibility by using ‘we’ statements.
SKIP LOADED WORDS: Terms like ‘toxic’ and ‘narcissistic’, even if true, won’t help.
BE CLEAR: Do you need a break, or do you never want to hear from them again? Be clear about expectations.
Quick tip: Take steps (literally) to quit fighting. When someone ticks you off, walking away will give you a better perspective and lower the toll on your overall health. It doesn’t mean you have to be happy with the situation – it’s more about taking a breath to process and then to calmly problem-solve.
HOW TO QUIT: Overeating
FRONT-LOAD YOUR PANTRY: Put less tempting snacks in plain sight, and tuck away ones you’ll eat mindlessly.
GET MORE SLEEP: Sleeping less than seven hours may trigger cravings for heavier foods.
AVOID ‘HANGER’: Eat three balanced meals a day and keep healthy snacks with a mix of protein, fat and fibre handy in sensibly portioned single serves.
DRINK MORE WATER: Staying hydrated helps keep you clear and focused.
EAT MINDFULLY: Avoid television and phones while eating – engage with the plate in front of you.
HOW TO QUIT: Nail-biting
Up to 30 per cent of people chew on their nails and this habit can lead to health problems such as an infection around the nail bed, says dermatologist Dr Joshua Zeichner. Biting your nails may also cause damage to your teeth and to your jaw alignment over time, he adds. Experts say the behaviour is often triggered by stress or boredom, and research suggests that it may also be genetic. To kick the habit, most people start by applying a nasty-tasting lacquer as a deterrent, but these strategies can also help:
IDENTIFY TRIGGERS: When and where do you start gnawing? While you’re at your desk? When you meet with your boss? Pick up a pen and log when your urges occur. “It’s difficult to write or type and bite your nails simultaneously,” says Dr Meghan McMackin, an anxiety-focused psychologist. Not only will writing help prevent you from putting fingers in your mouth, but you’ll also become aware of scenarios in which you’re likely to nibble. So, you can plan ahead to implement a replacement behaviour, such as using a fidget toy or chewing gum.
TRIM NAILS: Treat yourself to a luxe manicure and style your nails short – forking over money may naturally discourage you from destroying the result with your teeth. Plus, it’ll look nice and your cuticles won’t be as pickable.
COVER THEM UP: Try wearing gloves, bandages or even press-on nails – anything to physically hinder you from biting.
ADDRESS THE ROOT ISSUE: Sometimes nail-biting stems from boredom, which may mean you need a new challenge. Or perhaps it’s an anxious reaction to a troubling time. Consider seeing a therapist if you’re exhibiting other stress-related symptoms. And, of course, head to a dermatologist if your fingertips become swollen, tender or red.
HOW TO QUIT: Overthinking
Thousands of years ago, the practice of turning stuff over in our mind (also called rumination) was hardwired into our brain to keep us from repeating dangerous mistakes, says psychiatrist Dr Mimi Winsberg. Now, with fewer minute-to-minute risks, overthinking can lead to hours of agonising over mundane things. The trick to stopping this is to be compassionate with yourself. Start to notice when you’re having these worried thoughts, says clinical psychologist Dr Adrienne Meier, and then use these handy tips to proactively leave them behind:
DO A REALITY CHECK: Acknowledge when you’re obsessing about something and ask yourself: Can it be changed? Is this a problem that needs to be solved right now? If not, try to set the issue aside for the moment.
DISTRACT YOURSELF: Watch a film or play a game. “You can’t focus well on two things at once, so keeping your brain busy helps you stop ruminating,” Dr Meier says.
SET A TIMER: Allow five minutes to edit a straightforward email instead of tweaking it for 30.
RECOGNISE WHEN A PRO COULD HELP: Self-help may not be enough if your overthinking is part of clinical depression or anxiety, Dr Winsberg says. So, ask an expert for advice.
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